I decided to write about trust because even though it's not everyday we deal with trust issues, boy, when we do... be it in a romantic situation, a friendship, when we bring someone close to our business or our hearts, it's the places of the heart and mind that damage can be significant if trust is betrayed.. These can all be huge matters in our physical world, too... from job or financial loss to devastation in relationships, to major life destruction. Although I'm writing on this topic in general terms, there are implications about how trust fits into each of our worlds and how it wreaks havoc on very specific and individual matters.

For me and in recent years, matters of trust have surfaced and been important and have often defined the path towards my future as I move through trust issues. I have been both distrusted by someone I cared about and there have been betrayals in my life which have, at times, crushed my spirit deeply. There have been times that I distrusted when there was nothing at all confirming about what I distrusted... I simply had doubt and stifled action because of such doubt. Likewise, I have been doubted by others and there have been missed opportunities for better communication, stronger friendships, deeper love. I have no doubt that if you have lived your life a certain amount of time, you, too, have come to know all sides of the trust/distrust dichotomy and have life stories which affected you.

I want to speak to human nature as it relates to trusting, but first, a preface....

I found this interesting tidbit online, unfortunately without an author's claim to the wisdom. So much to ponder about these fine things....

The above sentiment favors trust over speculation and it is my nature to agree philosophically. It is an unnatural state... at least for me... to feel distrust. Usually, distrust occurs in response to some action by another which was questionable, at best, and for which a decision must be made by me to trust again (not easy to do). It can be done, however.. you can CHOOSE to trust. But like the teenager who sneaks out the bedroom window in the middle of the night and gets caught by the parent, that parent will need some time to trust again, no matter how sorry the child is for disobeying. Oh the power of TIME in healing wounds, in helping trust return.

Some matters of betrayal may seem insurmountable. Are they really? Only you know as you go through your life what you decide is tolerable or not. It is an individual response each person decides as to what the threshold is for betrayal.

If a man or woman cheats on his or her spouse, can the betrayed person forgive and find trust again? Statistically, our divorce rates tell us we can't handle that kind of betrayal, yet people do it all the time... stay together. Recover.

More examples:

Generally speaking, it seems so much easier to live a life that is honest, even if it is fraught with imperfection, and to be authentic and trustworthy rather than one of pretenses or theatrics. If you can't be authentic with others, at least get your head right each night knowing what your own truths are... and be on speaking terms with your God and be OK with how you conduct yourself. I've written about the importance of self-reflection