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Do You Seek the Quiet?

Do you welcome solitude... time alone to allow what's inside of you to surface? Or, in constrast, do you create or engage the world so full of opportunities, overscheduled and chaotic? If things are going well, do you cherish the chance to rest when nobody is demanding? Or do you instead stir up the things and people around you to create more activity, seeking greater stimulation and opportunities?

Does activity enliven you? Or do you feel "at home" in the spirit of quiet where you can just be? Whatever your preference, it may not be known to those closest to you. Sometimes the busiest people actually NEED and thrive on the quiet... like I do. Appearances aren't always what they seem... A person who is gregarious and seemingly extroverted may wear that mask because his or her job requires it, people expect that, etc. Oh I am so good at playing parts in my world. But that is not the real me, where I am most comfortable.

And then there is now... in the quiet. My music, my beloved blog, the freedom to be without having to be "something" or "someone"... a place of acceptance and flow, without judgment. And just enjoying this wholesome feeling of being OK with me. Anything goes.

My mind is on fire with so many thoughts and dreams and creativity. To some, it seems indulgence to engage the quiet. I hear so often that I need to just "go" "do" "live it" and don't question, inquire, or analyze. Time spent "just thinking" doesn't produce measurable outcomes, some say - like folded laundry, or memos that need sending, or a crowd of people watching a football game eating chips and dip, or any tangible thing. That's what they all say...

Oh they do not know the beauty of the quiet.. or what "MY" quiet means to me. I indulge for a time before a superbowl party this evening. I long for this. Time feels stolen and all mine, sneakily divine when I know I should be grading papers or sorting the hamper contents. I am alone. I am in the quiet... and sometimes I think this old familiar place (my imagination) is somehow going to spark solutions and awakenings, but that rarely ever happens, except sometimes it does. But today, right now... I just want to listen to lyrics and instruments and feel OK against the tide of a world that often feels so oppositional.

I am prayful today. In that way, my sadness rises. I don't understand the sadness and why lately it is everpresent within me. It is an energy, but it isn't bad. It isn't a bad thing... it is gentle and real and guiding. I am focused. I am in touch but not necessarily related to things ever so important. I know I want to find meaning in things not right around me. I am inspired through the sadness. I welcome whatever it is to try to understand it and work through it. Today, I can't put my finger on any one thing.

Sleepy, dreamy, contemplative, open.

Do not dismiss the quiet as a place to avoid.

Take off your shoes. Why do people wear shoes in the house? If it's cold, then slippers. If not, barefeet. Be comfortable. Coffee or tea isn't just for the morning, it's great like now.. after 3:00. Rest. Sleeeeeep.... poppies.

Do you have someone in your life with whom you can lay on a bed and both look up at the celing and just talk... or not talk... talk about nothing, just be in the quiet, hearts aligned, reveling in life experience without drama or activity, simply the relationship? Why can't we have more of this in our world?

Something about Sundays seem to give us permission to be in the quiet. End of the week and a day of rest... even God said it. Decades ago, no stores were open on Sundays... not grocery stores, not the mall... we were forced to stay home. Some of us remember... some of us practice a day of rest or at least a few hours.

Soon I will flurry about my room to put on make up and go to a party, but these last precious moments of quiet I claim for only me.

I hope you'll find some quiet for you and realize its beauty. Don't be fast to dismiss its value to the wholeness of living.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am going to miss your hormones you know

doreenmary said...

Dear Anonymous... Maybe post op after some time you'll discover it's not hormones, I'm really this intense all the time.

Spidey said...

i love quiet and seek it often.

this is a big change from the way i was when i was younger. i looked for noise and action back then. now i avoid those things.

what a difference 30 years makes. :)

Anonymous said...

then I will come and visit you in your padded cell :D

aliasmoi said...

I'm going to miss your PMS too. I always read your PMS posts, and think - someone else who knows what it's like to have her whole life ruled by the calandar and be out of her mind a week out of the month.

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