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The Need for Personal Space in Relationships

When I was married, my husband often drew an imaginary line on the bed as a reminder to stay on my own side when we went to sleep. Some people like to cuddle, others...well, not so much. If you think about it, for couples, even a king size bed isn't very much space if you're a sleeper who likes to spread out a little. And, who ever made it a rule that couples sleep in the same bed? I mean, it's kind of gross, if you think about it. Sleeping has a lot of physical ugly stuff that really makes a person unattractive... snoring, drooling, unattractive positioning. Sleeping together certainly has the potential to wreck the illusion of being beautiful, don't ya think?

I have a theory about personal space as it relates to societal evolution. I think one day we're just going to build houses which have separate WINGS for family members. Think about history... in the days of say, The Dick Van Dyke Show, the Petre couple had twin beds to sleep in. Now, this was a time when TV was seriously censored and it was unthinkable to put a couple in the same bed for it might inspire some sort of sexual thinking (God forbid!). OK... well, there is merit in the 2-bed thought for a couple for some of the physical uglies I just described. Yet, have you ever slept in a twin sized bed as an adult? OMG, it's alllllllll wrong, just too small.

What we need are separate rooms with beds the size of an entire room. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to roll around? To jump on it? To hang out, spread out... do your taxes or grade papers on a bigass bed alllllllllll to yourself?

And his and hers closets. What's with that, may I ask? Who wants his smelly ass shoes emitting odors into your dry clean only outfits? And you know... it's always the case, one person of the couple is neat, the other a curly-tailed piggy.

Bathrooms. Let's discuss how the architecture of bathrooms have evolved. Two sinks, one toilet. This doesn't help couplehood. Personally, I think we need DIVISIONS in bathrooms of the sinks and maybe even HIS and HERS toilets because some men don't put the seat down or they shit all over the back of the toilet (may I ask how it is that they manage to do THAT?) and everyone knows that people put toilet paper rolls on differently (should the paper roll over the top or roll out under? This is a philosophical debate). Then again, there are some men who still do not know the first step as to how to get the empty roll off the roller and install a fresh roll. As an aside: Message to Mothers of boys... I urge you to teach them how this feat is done in order to prepare them for manhood and marriage one day.

Would someone please invent something that when you flush the toilet while someone is taking a shower that the hot water doesn't become a scorching temperature while washing one's body? This is another complication of shared bathrooms.

Let's just design and build houses now that have an appreciation for the differences of the sexes, as well as a little bit of respect for some privacy on bodily functioning and such.

Your thoughts?


Jilly said...

the first time i met my guy's family we were at their house. i was sitting on the sofa talking to the dad when all of a sudden a banging noise comes from the basement. someone was stomping up the staris at slightly faster than the speed of sound. this same person rounded the livingroom and ran for the stairs to the second floor while shouting "In my house, EVERYONE sits to pee! You will sit to pee!" it was the mom. she then ran up the second floor stairs and opened a door (to the bathroom) and kept on screaming about how dare someone stand to pee in her house. I should have known that she was bonkers then, but i ignored it.

and as to sleeping, i hate to be touched in any way when sleeping. i am not a cuddle while sleeping fan and become angry when someone does touch me. if i want to cuddle, i'll do it before sleep, say goodnight, and then move to my side. however, if my guy isn't sleeping next to me, it's hard for me to sleep. you don't have to touch to enjoy someone being close to you.


Roger D. Curry said...

Paradoxically, I can sleep in a small area. I prefer silence, darkness and COLD. As such, I'm not so attractive, I suppose, to those in search of romance.


I agree, I love the kingsize bed, and although I don't have to kick the parter completely out of the bed, would just love more physical space, being a mom, I have been driven insane sometimes by the lack of 'personal space', whether it's the need for the bathroom by myself, or just a quiet day at the house.
I don't have anything against snuggling, it is just that the older I have gotten the more i require to be left alone to sleep, I love to stretch out when sleeping too, it just seems to wake me up more often, when there is someone else sleeping beside me. As for men who don't know how to change the TP roll...maybe their moms taught them(my 13 yr old boy can tell you, I have taught him how to be a useful guy around the house!) but, they just plain don't care whether it is done or not(it's a guy thing, I think.) Personal space definitely has it's place in relationships of every shape and size, it's just a matter of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.


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