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Underneath it All. Express Yourself!

I have a few good friends with whom I am close enough to really be honest -- I'm talking sans ego and at depths beyond dangling conversations. You know who you are if you're reading this -- I love you. To me, all of life is a mystery for us to unravel, finding an individual path towards mastery and wisdom. And we hit road bumps along the way and get "stuck" and find ourselves angry or hurt. It is so good when find connection with another or others who help us on the path.

There is great pain in "seeking". I know why "ignorance is bliss" because if you never ponder or explore, you can't get hurt. But in choosing to NOT engage... is to be numb. You might as well be a rock, or any inanimate thing. To venture and confront truth, hard as it seems sometimes, is to risk and to sometimes hurt. And I almost always choose the harder way -- the right way -- and I often get a hammer to my hand in so doing... because nothing good or worthwhile comes easy (which is why we place value on "earned" things). And when seeking-- when your efforts involve others-- they may not be coming from the same mindedness as you or receive your message with your same passion. Still, we must try to resolve differences, transcend situations, and live authentically and in communion with those around us. We must bend and compromise and we must find congruence in doing so, that we do not lose who we are within it. And we must have hope that others will pay us the same respect towards peace.

To me, it is ever so important to be authentic, even when it goes against tradition or expectations -- but this can be achieved with love and understanding when it differs with affected people. Oh, you know all the quotes, "To thine own self be true." Such grand benefits in leading a life that is genuine... but in doing so means also to be responsible and kind and thoughtful to others... to choose the high road and to be good. I think sometimes people are so busy leading their own life and truths that they forget that they are an important influence on those around them. I realize I'm being vague here, and I'm often accused of speaking in platitudes, but there is a message here I want to blog about...

I've learned in my own life, that "feelings" are worthy of attention. When we are angry or sad or even happy and light... it is extremely important to explore the root of such emotion. For within it is truth and guidance to bring us closer to leading the life we were intended to live out. Negativity is NORMAL... And underneath negativity you find hurt and underneath that, you find it's core... love. This is true. This is so true and only those who self-search will find that love is from where everything comes.

Perhaps there would be chaos in the world if couples and families were honest with one another and really laid it on the line what is felt, or what one wants or needs... to express disappointment and pain. For doing so is to TRUST others that they will care enough to respond or negotiate, or find mutual truth that is not only livable, but ideal. If we do not hurt or feel, than we are that rock or inanimate thing that is simply "indifferent". If we care, then we feel and we hurt. I feel an obligation to myself and those I love to share what's inside and communicate... and there is always hope and faith in resolve and union.

Who will stand with their feet in the fire to never give up on someone or something? Even if someone has to walk away because there is no meeting of the minds (business, personal relationships, whatever)... can't we still find respect and love and forgiveness in letting them go -- isn't that still loving them? I believe we can! Good always wins.

The truth is the only place in which to live.

I read an interesting quote in a psychology article that speaks to the primal urge for living out truth...

The average two-year-old is a great beacon for emotional health, displaying a full range of emotions and moving beyond them once they are expressed.

How wonderful that our human nature is to be honest and OK with who we are to express it.

Express Yourself!

I will always speak out on things important and you will never wonder what my position is on any issue. If something isn't working in a relationship, I will not sleep or eat until I make my best effort to soul-search and either find my blame or express my truth to another. I do not care if I appear humble (and thereby weak?)... it is my core value to find truth... to come from light without subterfuge or manipulation.

We are all children with raw emotion and hurts and anger. And that's quite all right. The few people in our world who know us... truly know us.... serve as reminder that underneath it all is something beautiful and good, just as we see in them.

Madonna - Express Yourself [Video]
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Jilly said...

you know, i live with a 2 y.o. and i can't wait until she's somwhere close to 5ish. yeah they can express themselves, but it's not always appropriate and yes, sppropriateness is a factor. you don't get to beat the snot out of the kid who's playing with the ball you want and then scream like a nutter because you had to say sorry and go stand in the corner. that's life.

i did like:
"I've learned in my own life, that "feelings" are worthy of attention. When we are angry or sad or even happy and light... it is extremely important to explore the root of such emotion."

boy did i have the nasty habbit of using food to hide some important feelings. many people do this, some over eat and some don't eat at all. food is a powerful drug. and some people are so good at hiding it, you'd never know that they had an issue. I was lucky enough to figure out that i needed to change a few things before i taught my kid to emotionally eat her heart out and before i got any of the negative physical issues associated with.

again, it's about appropirate. we over-repress our feelings (especially women) and often say sorry for the stupidest things, like asking someone to pass the salt, or for dropping a can of corn on the ground. wtf is wrong with us? we need the salt and people drop cans. there's nothing to be sorry for, and it's okay to put someone else out in a minor way, because chances are, they'll want some salt too at some point. and when it really matters few people seem to have the balls to pitch a really good fit.

we should really teach the ability to gauge appropriateness when we teach people emotional control. sometimes you HAVE to let it all hang out and other times, just forget it ever happened. that's life.


Spidey said...

expressing myself is never a problem. not expressing myself, is.

mavis sidebottom said...

the mirena IUS don't forget to ask your gynaecologist your hormones need a good slap ;

Roger D. Curry said...

Personally, I'm every bit as authentic as George Washington's hatchet. The handle has only been replace 4 times and the head twice. So there!


doreenmary said...

I love, love, love that you guys come here and express yourself honestly. Even when you're right about stuff and I don't like it. Heh. oxxoxo.